I was reminded this week of the Talking Stick that was used by North American tribes to confirm the person who had the right to speak. What is interesting to me, is that by implication, it also confirmed the role of everyone else as listeners.
In many ways, those who were not holding the stick had a greater responsibility.
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Stephen Covey.
So how do you listen?
Do you listen with the desire to get hold of the Talking Stick as soon as you can?
Here are some simple questions to prompt your thinking about how you listen…
And if you skim through them without seeking to understand or answer them, you just proved something to yourself about how you ‘listen’ 🙂
- I like listening to speakers who…
- I switch off when someone is talking and they…
- I concentrate on what someone is saying when…
- If I can’t have my say in a conversation, I feel…
- If I can’t understand what someone is saying, then I…
- I feel nervous listening to someone when…
- Habits I find irritating in a speaker include…
- When someone is speaking, I spend most of my time…
- Things that distract me when someone is speaking include…
- When someone is speaking very slowly I…
Now…
- What do you need to start doing to become a more effective listener?
- What do you need to continue doing to be an effective listener?
- What do you need to stop doing to become a more effective listener?
My best wishes, Paul
